Technical difficulties…Last day to win a free St Michael Thomas t-shirt..

Firstly Gooner’s a big welcome back, as you may have noticed there’s been no new post since last week Thursday this is all due to ‘techincal difficulties’. Anyhow we seem to be up and running now a bit like our young ‘uns. Paul Wright our roving reporter’s column was due to be posted on Friday prior to our opening win of the season against northern monkeys West Brom of the Albion where Samir Nasri scored a debutant goal. Just think another ten goals from the youngster and we WILL all be thinking Alex Who? Any road up take your mind back pre-weekend and read the post below and enjoy it Gooner’s, some of the content has been changed slightly just to confuse you into thinking you’ve just stepped out of a time machine. Please – read on.

Lightweights to win the league… 

Looking at the Arsenal squad for the match played last week against FC Twente was a strange thing. Here we were playing a game, which along with the return leg back at The Grove, was worth 20 Million Euros for the winner, and we were going into it with a 17yr old debutante at the heart of our team, hoping to be dragged through by the relative experience of a 19yr old with just 23 appearances for the club. I know it’s Olympic season, and the gymnasts and divers all seem to be getting younger, but this was getting ridiculous. We had 16 year old Jack Wilshere on the bench just in case one of the ‘older’ pro’s got injured. It’s just mental. 

But we got through the away game, and I guess it’s all experience for our kids. And we beat Steve McClaren.. and that makes me very happy indeed. They now have to come back to our place by which time we should have Cesc and Nasri back, Touré should be fit, and fingers crossed for no injuries we should spank them good and proper. Still no signings though, and with a lot of our reputed targets going and cup toeing themselves it’s starting to get a bit worrying. But I’m sure Le Gaffer has a plan to bring in a 4 yr old goalkeeper from Finland and will convert him into a rugged hard tackling midfielder in the Vieira mould. 

Still, the strange thing is, despite all this youth and me panicking, we’re not actually doing to bad so far. We hardly struggled in pre-season and a lot of our fringe players look like they could step up, Bendtner in particular looked very impressive. And if this slightly lightweight squad can win things and force our inexperienced players to quickly gain experience, then when the likes of Rosicky and Eduardo get back, things might not look nearly so bad. 

In other news our old friend Jose Moaninho has been spouting off a lot recently about us. I couldn’t be bothered to read any of it to be honest – can’t someone run him over repeatedly with a bus? With spikes on the tyres. Then parade his pulped head around the ground at the first game of the season. That would really make me feel a lot better about football in Europe. I’m sure the ‘mind games’ will begin with Sir Manure shortly too. A week before the season he always seems to decide to take a swipe at whoever is threatening him that particular week. Trouble is, until they get a translator in, nobody can understand a word he says. And while we are busily worrying about our lads, United have no Ronaldo and Rooney is off round the back of the training sheds having five quick cigarettes, and Liverpool are doing their usual trick of forgetting to score goals. We know Sp*rs will implode and Chelski.. well who knows about them. They could just as soon appoint Vladimir Putin as their new manager should ‘Big Phil’ not win 9 – 0 in his opening fixture. So all in all i’m quite hopeful for this season, despite the slight concerns about our squad depth. 

Anyway… see y’all on the other side kids… lets get some of those Chinese synchronised divers in – they seem to know how to win stuff and if nothing else would probably win a shed load of free kicks!

My take on Hleb’s comments, Rambo wants First Blood, Arsenal miss out on defender..

Good day to you all Gooners on this bright, well sort of bright then rain then a bit of brightness again, then more rain. Anyway moving on – a bit like a certain Bell-end-Russian we all know, boom boom, the talk of the day is on Hleb. who else? I know something was up when I got a text of brother Brian this morning at 6.45. Basically it read something along the lines of “Have you read The Mirror today, all I can say is Hleb, Orange and all agents are c*nts.” Good morning to you too! First things first though Gooners I NEVER read The Mirror, might as well subscribe to The Daily Sport for all the ‘news’ in that paper. So I jumped on the net to see what all the hullabaloo was about. Admittedly I try not to go over the top on some stories and you’ve guessed it I’m not getting to worked up and going to be getting ulcers from this one. I will have a word with my bruv as well to chill him out. The reason I’m so laid back with the Hleb stories is that most newspaper sites have nicked the same word and said Hleb ‘Blasts’ The Arsenal boss and Cesc Fabregas. But here’s his statement:

“My view of football and Wenger’s didn’t coincide at all. I raised the subject of leaving with Wenger twice before the end of the season. It’s not easy for me to leave and I think he was upset about it. But you should ask him. It may turn out that he’s happy about it.”

Now where the f*ck is there a ‘blast’? Sorry I can’t even see it and I’m sure the Prozac and Xanax pills I scored the other day isn’t affecting my brain. Can any of you Gooners see a ‘blast’ if you do please tell me. I read Arseblogger’s post this morning and he is coming from the same school of thought. Basically there’s fook all news doing the rounds so the papers/sites are just shit stirring and getting all Gooners bent out of shape. Why? Because they can. However I am taking a stand and following my own path and wont be lead by them fooks. So Hleb wants to leave the manager doesn’t want him to, hardly a ‘blast’ is it people, more of a difference of opinion, but that doesn’t sound sexy at all does it? Newspapers wont shift large units and sites wont get loads of hit counts if it simply reports: ‘Hleb wants out, Wenger wants him to stay’. Far from sexy really isn’t? About as sexy as Vanessa Feltz covered in baby oil wearing nothing but a Ann Summers baby doll outfit and a feather boa. Yikes! Anyway I think you good people get the picture, although you might need therapy to shift the image of Feltz out your mind. 

The other part of Hleb’s statement where he apparently ‘blasts’ The Cesc™ by saying:

“When we get scoring opportunities, Fabregas is much more selfish than me. Given a chance to shoot, he always goes for it – unlike me”.

OK anyone spot a ‘blast’? Hands up anyone? Anyone? Any Gooners out there who have watched Hleb play ever say ‘Hleb shouldn’t shoot as much as he does. Every time he is in front of goal with a clear scoring opportunity he always opts for the shot, he never passes, he’s a right greedy little bastard’. Anyone? OK I will give a tenner to any Gooner who has ever said that. Yup, just what I thought. In fact it’s a wonder Hleb he managed to keep hold of his wife because any time he’s near the box he never shoots. One thing is for sure he’ll never have kids we know that much. 

So, so much for Hleb ‘blasting’ all things Arsenal. But with now new signings imminent and his protracted   move away, the start of the football season some way away, be prepared for more of these sensationalist stories. Your best bet from going mental? Just take them with a pinch of salt, or better still read between the lines. Actually read the quotes, not the headline, which is created to get you in a ‘mood’ to get really emotional and bent out of shape. Judging by some blog’s out there the papers/sites seem to be winning the battle.

Rambo wants First Blood..

Love that title? Yeah I thought it was quite good too, damn I’m on fire today. Any road up young Welshman and Arsenal leg-end in the making simply for turning Manchester USA to join us Aaron ‘Rambo’ Ramsey says he is gearing up to get a spot in the first Premier League game of the season in the three pointer against West Brom Albion. The 17 year old is quoted as saying:

“I will try my best to get in the starting line-up at the beginning of the season against West Brom. I am joining one of the biggest clubs in the world, one which always gives young players an opportunity at the highest level. I am going to work my hardest to be part of future successes there”.

Great to hear stuff like that. I very much doubt that he’ll figure in the first team for a while in the league games, but you can’t question his talent. It will be interesting to see how he does in the pre-season games to see if he can really stake a claim on a midfield berth. 

transfer news…

Other news doing the rounds is that we missed out on Clément Chantôme a 20 year old defender who has decided to sign an extension with Paris Saint-Germain. Can’t say I’m too arsed about missing out on him, he’s hardly the experience player we need to scare the bejesus out of opposition strikers.

Apparently Andrei Arshavin’s price tag is £24m, his club Zenit St Petersburg say he wont leave for a penny less… so see ya then mate, The Arsenal wont move for him unless someone goes for around the same price, can anyone see that happening?

Jump on board Gooners and join the comments!

 

 

Allgoonerdup goes FaceBook

 

It had to happen, Allgoonerdup has gone and got itself on FaceBook. So get yourself on there and link us up, tell you mates, your family, whoever, join the fun and socialise on the worlds number one social network. OK I’m not getting paid to say any of that but you know the coo. 

 

 

To link us up just go to: http://www.facebook.com and in the search area type in either: 

Tommi Gooner or Allgoonerdup and you’ll get to the right spot. The idea is get a load of Gooners on there and share in everything…. well Arsenal.